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  • #4114

    Lori
    Participant

    For 6 months, My husband and his brother are spending 50% of their time each mom-sitting in another state. The other 3 siblings lives are status quo ( because of their “obligations”). My husband is the only one w a wife and teenager. Mom says that she feels bad that he is away from home but when my husband tries to discuss options ( the only affordable one is to move into an assisted living facility) she gets mad and says no. At our wits end. Have talked to her about this not being ideal long term for her. Feeling trapped. any advice?

    • This topic was modified 2 years, 7 months ago by  Lori.
    • This topic was modified 2 years, 7 months ago by  Lori.
    #4156

    Penny
    Participant

    Parents are the king ad Queen of manipulation.  Because we are their children we bite hook line and sinker.  My advice make changes drip by drip.  Try hiring a little bit of help so your husband is home one more day.  Then increase, good Luck.  I tried to hire an assistant for my mother and she had an “out an out” tantrum.  I havn’t been working the last 5 years, so I could care for my mother.  She is in heart failure they keep telling me anytime.  That sounded dreadful, but it puts a strain on my husband and I.  Plus, my RA gets worse and I don’t know how many more years I have to work.  You will never change the siblings.  I have threatened , begged you name it,  I have 6 siblings.  Of course Mom doesn’t want to change she is getting what she wants.  I feel your pain, its almost impossible.  But you have to protect your familly.  Don’t let your parent obligations run you into the ground.   I go to my parents and do everything in 2 days.  they want me to move in, I told them no, I don’t want to.

     

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